God and Stuff

Jerimiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

This is my favorite verse from the whole bible. I think about it all the time and it gives me inspiration. I wanted to share it with you to inspire you too. Just think about it God has plans for us so we can know that we have a future that we are gunna be ok. thats great to know.

I went to camp with my church a few weeks ago. We went to camp Caswell at the North Carolina coast. It was a great time and I really got a lot out of it. Like I figured out that God wants me to go into missions. Which has been a big thing for me cause i have been thinking about and dealing with this for a long time. I still am struggling with it too a point like questioning whether i will be able to do what is required to be a missionary and stuff like that.

Another problem i'm having is not wanting to go to church. Like i used to love church but i think it used to be for the people not for God. Now all the people at my church have changed and its just not the same. Its not as welcoming and as loving as it used to be. I think it has something to do with my mental illness but i'm not positive. So i don't go to church i don't read my bible or pray most of the time, sometimes i do but not a lot, but i still come back all the time to being pulled to the mission field. Is that bad....i still believe in God and stuff. I have definitly done my share of questioning him though but overall i believe in him.

Is this bad? I know i need to do better. Maybe i can set up a schedule for doing a devotion every day then i can get back on track with doing them and start spending time with God because i do miss God. He's my friend my best bud and i haven't been communicating with him for a while now. This is definitly what i'm gunna do. alright i'm gunna go work on that for a while. see ya!